thinking in a positive way, this way let me know your true color? if everyone really hate me, why do they still talk to me? is it very fake? if u think the way that i talk hurt everyone, don't u think that the way u talk also hurt people too. I can't stop myself to talk this way, unless I just shut my mouth, if this is the way u want.

even though I always complain, but I am still happy with what I have. so I doubt u will think this way. I only can say sorry, and I will just shut my mouth.

year 2011 is ending real soon. I am glad to have you, and I sorry to lose you.

resolution: I want to go oversea (even though no one is going with me), might going alone.
will fking save 10k.

this kind of days, how long I still have endure. I really dislike it so much till I treat it as hotel. I feel numb and sad. I suppose to have a good r/s with my parent. but until one day...u came back. ended up, I distance with my parent.

why the fuck you are back? I miss those days when I can sleep alone. the room is mine. but now, I only sleep at my room. other than that I was stuck in living room.

the noise you make, the sound you make, the volume you talk. and you just think that everyone in this house is dead. u r just fking rude. I don't understand why you have to close the cabinet with a loud sound or perhaps you are dear?

I really hope one day I can say "FUCK YOU" to you!!

thankful that I still have a bunch of friends. Vanessa who gave me a surprise for my bday. thanks buddy! my beloved gf, they are always there for me! and of cuz my cutest bf, who always scold me and making happy. thanks~ I know I can do it.

I nv think of anything bad, but just to
hope that she can change that all.

suddenly just feel like blogging. haha. tml have to work again. how I wish got lots of money now. don't need to worry about money stuff. sian~ but guess I won't have this kind of life.

nowadays I wonder if I was thinking too much. was telling bf that I might have cancer.... blah blah blah. I really scare that I will have illness. now my hair start to drop a lot. my gum is getting weaker. back always pain. what's wrong with me? :(

last thing: when can she be change? i really miss those days that I can sleep alone, without anybody disturb. but now, seriously I hate it ttm. is not that I don't like home, I just don't like to share a room with her. zzzzzz~

a question to myself: what is a home to me? I couldn't answer when I think of this question. I don't talk to my brothers, parent or even sister. is not that I don't want to talk to them. is just that I don't like to share the room with her. because she will treat the whole room like I am invisible. making noise like nobody business. so many years, she didn't change at all. I pissed off so
many times, but what the use. i will
just forget easily. of course I wasnt the best too. I have attitude too.

but I just kept quiet at home. didn't share out anything to them. I just feel distance from them. yes, is hurt but what to do.

all I wish is to move out of this house. will give parent monthly allowance, that's all.

sometime i just hope she faster get marry and move out. I will be more happier. I got no choice and have stay over at bf's house every weekend. staying with this kind of person, how long a person can endure? seriously I think none.

fk, family issue again.

what a day!

sometime I just wish to be alone. where there won't be any troubles.
anyway, won't be sharing it out too. I will forget it.

I have lost all my friends and I know it. time couldn't go back anymore and eventually I will be alone. yeah~ this is my life. I better start to do something before the worst could have happen.

since I alr waste alot of time, I will have to go back and learn driving again. back to those days.....

I really wish I have lots of money. first to buy house, and live alone. second is to buy lots of things that I want. third is to learn whatever shit want. and many more.

seriously, I don't know what to do. :(

today is a ph. went over to bf's Hse to stay. as mj girl will fetch me to buy some stuff for her wedding. ended up we went to her house and play mj. -.-

after playing 2 pok of mj, she fetched me back to bf's house. like a shiok. :) have a nap with bf till 7 pm. slack and went to hg mall to have late dinner. we realize is too early and he suggest to
go to his house and slack awhile. so
I agree and went back to his house. watch running man, and we 2 laugh like a idiot.

around 11.15pm, he send me to take cab. and went back home after that. this is how I spend my ph today.

I really feel so loved by you. ;)
thanks bi~

is Monday morning, 12 am. zzz~ got to work later again, sian. but wed is a ph.

but still have to wake up early on wed because have to buy wedding stuff, but I am so lazy to go out on ph. just want to nua at home. haha

glad that bf send me home even though I beg him. -,- but I know he will send me home when I ask him to do, :) thanks bi~

shall sleep now. can't wait for my pay day. don't even know what I spent this whole month. money keep spending like nobody business. zzz~ gonna save for my taiwan trip next year.

finally get to watch real steel. super cool and awesome can. love Hugh jackman ttm. :)

friend's wedding in 3 weeks time. quite excited about it. cuz is my first being a Jie Mei. haha. hopefully it will be fun and grats to her. :)

I want to go oversea. next yr bkk and tw. alright, hopefully I can go and him too, haha.

I don't understand why. just a simple thing is to put the clothes to washing machine and hang it yet no fucking person doing it. I also need to work leh. wtf. mum come back only put the blame on me cuz I am the laziness. like hello~ iron clothes also me, wash clothes also me. all come home early also don't want to do. one word: selfish!!!! seriously i hate it and pissed off.

enough of my complaining. sian. dont know what to get for my phone. shall I wait or buy? hmmm..

weekend is ending soon. :( I hate it the most. :(

I really miss those day when we could actually talk for hours, play and joke around. but I guess things won't be the same anymore. i won't ask for more, just hope things will be like last time. feel so stranger now.

I want to go bkk. anyone want to go with me? hmm..shall save money first. got to do lots of things next year. and everything need money money money. zzzz~

actually a fight/quarrel is good. make each other say out their feelings. still cry over it, not because I am sad. just cry because I feel like crying. -.- sound a bit lame but is true.

after all, everything back to normal~ happy go lucky. although something I hope it can go back to how we started, how we were teasing each other. those days were fun and loving. haha..but now still fun and loving, it just in a different way. miss those days~

thanks bi!
although u suck in some way. but u still give me joy.
let work hard together!

I tot it will be a good day for me. but it turn out to be so suck. :(

anger words are always hurtful. and I will remember what you have said. whether is your anger word or what, I believe it is from your heart. thanks for telling me.

so many things I wanted to do. shall save up so money first. plan for lots of activity for myself. haha..hope to learn some skill. study and oversea.

nobody is at home now, except my dad. home seem to be so quiet. suddenly feel so lonely~

there are so many things I wanted to say. just forget it. nth change. :(

So boring.
Nothing to do at work again. =.=

Shall blog awhile.
This few weeks start to have quarrel about game stuff.
Ya, is stupid.
Is already happen once before. And now is coming back again.
There are so much things i wanted to say.
I just chose to let go and forget it.
Because i have prepare for the worst to come.
This is only just the beginning.

3 months to my birthday. ^^

Last sat went to USS with Love.
Was fun although the sun was burning me.
Thanks love for sitting all the rides with me.
Without any complain.
And we will be going again. (Y)

Love will start working next week.
Hopefully everything will be okay.

Feel like buying a bike to go to work.
Might sound crazy but my workplace is very near my house.
By car, I guess reach my workplace only 5 to 10 minutes.
zzzz.. Can i have more money?
I got lots of things to buy

Hello August. =)

I can't get along with my colleagues.
Didn't have much things to talk to them.
But still happy with my job. =)

Love going to ORD in few DAYS time.
Like finally. (Y)
Going to his ord parade this coming thursday.
Have to take cab to his camp, cuz is too rush plus dont know how to walk to his camp.

Sat going back to malaysia for my uncle's wedding dinner.
But will be back on sunday, coming back ALONE.
I abit scare. I never come back alone before. X(

Last week, spend everyday with love.
I love it so much....
Get to see him everyday.
Of course there are some misunderstanding, after awhile everything back to normal.
His attitude...I got no comments.
Seriously too imba le.
HAHAH..
Won't be going BKK this year. But going cruise next month.
I will gonna to help him celebrate his birthday this year.
Already have some planning for it.
Dont know which one will be the best. LOL.

Thanks BI.
Many hugs and kisses!

Happy birthday to BOSS~ :D

Random post for today.
Finally started to work last week.
Overall still a good place for me.
And there are lots of things to learn too.

Pre-celebration birthday for boss on sat.
Was late because had to get her gift and cake.
She was shock that we actually bought cake for her. Haha..
Took some pictures at marine square.
Left there around 9 plus, but due to the NDP and lots of place road block. -.-
Walked to selegie with boss and her bf.
Went home after that.

Working at expo with bee on sunday.
Kena complain by the boss because we are TOO slack. -.-
Wth! and this coming we dont need to work le.
Fine~ don't care too.

I was selfish on last thursday.
Told Love that i want him to spend the day with me. haha~
And he cancel his mj session for me.
Celebrate our 5th month anniversary together.
Thanks Love!
Really appreciate what you have did for me.
Was thinking back how u treat me, just like a baby. =)
Have make sure at night i have blanket, fan have to blow me.
I have such a sweet BF, my lovely BI~

Weekend without LOVE.

Is really been so long since i am at home on SAT.
Sigh.
I was hardly at home on sat ever since i ended my previous relationship.
Was ton-ing with friends every weekend.
And when i was attached to my beloved bf, was staying at his house every sat.
Can't use to it to stay at home on sat.
Haha... At least my sis is not around. The room is MINE. ^^

Chatting with LOVE just now for an hours plus.
Since so long we had chatted on phone for so long.
Miss those days~

Next week will be starting my new job.
Pray that everything will go smoothly.
Plus LOVE stuff too.
Hope he will know what he want and find a job soon too.

I won't say much.
I feel so upset but i hate to see it too.
I just don't understand why.
Thought you will face it but guess you just running away.
Just feel tired of it.
Just let go~

Is july.
Year is ending soon again.
Time pass so fast. =(

Finally found a job and will start work on 11.
yeah! Happy.

Last week, spent my days with love.
Stay over at his house from tues till sun.
Haha, was madness.
But I enjoy it.
We had haircut together.
Accompany him to buy his stuffs.
Watch anime.
Relaxing life, before start work.
The next 2 weekend, he wont be booking out. =(
Only get to see him on thurs and fri.
And 1 more month to his ORD.
Finally, he will be working full time and studying too.
And no more ARMY life. Yeah~

For that matter, i wont bother and care so much le.

Is 22 June 11.
Still remember a year ago, i was crying all day.
Anyway is already past le.
But yesterday, I was so sad.
Sad about everything. My mum and boyfiee.
Make him so pissed off.
Sigh.
I am such a failure person.
Now i only hope to find a job.
Get a life.
Finish my driving and get a diploma cert.
And everything need money.
Money, money, money.
What to do? I am not born with a sliver spoon.
Have to earn everything using my own hands.
And i won't depend on anyone.

Change my blogskin to simple looking.
As boyfiee keep complaining.

Quit my job and i am jobless for 3 weeks.
No income.
Slack at home.
Watch shows to kill time.
This kind of life is enjoyable but don't have money to spend. =.=

Recently having problems with family.
Kinda sian le, and make me dont feel like going home.
Is really sad.
Now i start to stay at my room, using lappy whole day.
What to do? Parents are too xian si le.
Sigh.
Shut up and just let on. =(

Can i have a short gateway?